Can Kids Really Cause Divorce? Debunking the Myths

can kids really cause divorce debunking the myths

Picture this: It’s a normal Tuesday night, and the Smith family hums with chaos that main families with small children can genuinely appreciate. Toys are dissipated like confetti post-New Year’s Eve, the child’s moaning could keep show vocalists honest, and the canine, detecting the disturbance, concludes this is the ideal second to institute his fantasy about turning into an indoor cyclone.

Amid this hurricane, Mr. and Mrs. Smith trade a look that says, “It’s your chance to deal with the mayhem,” and “I want an excursion” simultaneously.

In minutes like these, it’s not difficult to ponder: might these cute, sometimes overpowering, smaller-than-normal people at any point be the explanation couples head for Splitsville? It’s an inquiry murmured at playdates and considered over espresso cups once the kid’s last snooze.

Yet, before we begin faulting the toddlers for the ascent in divorce measurements, how about we jump into some myth-busting? Lock in because we will investigate the question: Can kids truly cause divorce? Fair warning: It’s not quite as direct as you could suspect!

Common Belief that Children Can Strain Marriages to the Point of Divorce

Ah, the normal conviction that kids are like minuscule, delightful destroying balls to conjugal rapture – a thought, however far-reaching as the possibility that stepping on a Lego seems to be a definitive trial of parental determination. Can we look at things objectively? Before kids, couples could have squabbled about who neglected to record the season finale of their #1 show. Post-kids, it’s more about who changed the last diaper and why the front room seems to be a scene from a toy End of the World.

Our little beloved newborns don’t show up with a manual (no doubt stirring up a lot of disappointment for restless guardians all over). They do, be that as it may, bring a tornado of progress. There are restless evenings, which can make a zombie look very much refreshed. Then, at that point, there’s the monetary drive around – because clearly, kids have this uncanny capacity to outgrow garments quicker than you can say “diaper victory.” And we should not fail to remember the heartfelt meals that transform into an ensemble of child cries or baby fits.

So, indeed, kids can bring pressure, weariness, and monetary strain – all known fixings in the not-really-fun mixed drink of marital strain. Yet, is it reasonable to give them all the credit for controlling the marriage transport towards rough shores? Presumably not. Faulting the little ones for everything may very well be the grown-up rendition of “the dog ate my schoolwork.” Yet, as we’ll see, the fact of the matter is a smidgen more complicated and much less finger-sharp.

How this Myth has Evolved Over Time

The myth that kids are the guilty parties behind conjugal disagreement and possible divorce isn’t simply a cutting-edge sitcom plotline; its foundations stretch back through history, developing with changing cultural standards and assumptions.

The account was unique in the right time to the mid-twentieth 100 years. Youngsters were seen nearly as a conjugal paste. The customary family model maintained that having kids was a characteristic and settling step in a marriage. It wasn’t just about adoration or heritage but also about friendly assumptions and monetary needs. In those days, the possibility of kids causing conjugal strain was less noticeable, halfway because different issues like financial difficulty and cultural tensions assumed more critical parts in marital problems.

Quick forward to the late twentieth and mid 21st hundreds of years, and the content flipped. The story started to change with the ascent of independence and a more noteworthy spotlight on private satisfaction. The cutting-edge time they have carried another arrangement of difficulties: double profession families, the difficult exercise of work-life combination, and a more open conversation about psychological wellness and relationship elements. As guardians investigated these new waters, the stressors connected with raising youths became clearer. Out of the blue, there was an emphasis on how kids could unexpectedly add to the intimate strain, from the fretful nights and lessened individual open doors to the conversations over supporting styles and financial pressures.

Online amusement and the web play moreover affected reshaping this myth. Gatekeepers are constantly flooded with pictures of ‘astonishing’ families, fortifying the strain to prevail concerning support and marriage. This absurd portrayal can demolish weaknesses and stress, provoking more weight on the marital relationship.

Consequently, the progression of this myth reflects greater changes in social characteristics, money-related conditions, and social principles. At the point when kids were seen exclusively as unifiers and pictures of a productive marriage, today, the story perceives the complexities and challenges they bring to the marital condition. Regardless, it’s paramount that while young people can change the components of a relationship, they are not the sole pilots of a couple’s intimate trip.

Tips for Maintaining a Healthy Marriage with Kids

Communication is Your Compass: Keeping an open line of communication is essential. Discuss everything from parenting challenges to personal dreams. It’s the cornerstone of understanding and empathy in any relationship.

Quality Time is Gold: In the hustle of parenting, your relationship can unintentionally take a backseat. Prioritize date nights or even brief coffee chats. It’s about finding moments of connection amidst the chaos.

Teamwork Makes the Dream Work: Share parenting duties. It’s not just about fairness but about showing support for each other. This shared journey can strengthen your bond immensely.

Preserve Your Individuality: Remember, you are more than just parents. Maintaining individual interests nurtures your personal growth and enriches your relationship.

Lean on Your Village: Don’t shy away from seeking help or advice, be it from family, friends, or professionals. Sometimes, a fresh perspective can be invaluable.

Constructive Conflict Management: Disagreements are inevitable, but resolving them constructively is key. It’s about finding solutions together, not winning an argument.

Financial Unity: With kids, financial stress is a given. Open discussions and joint planning can prevent this stress from seeping into your relationship.

Keep the Flame Alive: Emotional, intellectual, and physical intimacy are all facets of a close bond. Nurturing these can keep the spark alive in your marriage.

Remember Why You Started: In the thick of parenting struggles, recall why you chose each other. Keeping sight of your shared goals and love can be a powerful anchor.

Finally, and critically, consider the job of a divorce lawyer not as an unavoidable piece of a marriage venture but as a sign of what’s in question. Drawing in a divorce attorney isn’t just about lawfully heading out in different directions; a significant step influences the whole family.

Hence, putting time and exertion into reinforcing your marriage saves the expected profound monetary expense and safeguards the holiness and bliss of your loved ones. Consider it fabricating a tough and cherishing home for your youngsters, however, for yourselves too.

Final Words

While kids can turn your home into a mix of a zoo and a 24/7 diner, they’re not the chief architects of divorce. Remember, it’s about steering the ship together through the stormy seas of parenting. And if you ever feel like you’re navigating these waters with a broken compass, don’t hesitate to contact us – we’re here to throw you a life raft, not just a wet blanket!

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Written by: the Divorce Fast Team

Our team of Ontario lawyers has over 15 years of experience handling divorce and other family law matters.

All of our lawyers are in good standing with the Law Society of Ontario, and have the knowledge and experience to help and guide you through your family law issues. Whether your matter pertains to divorce, separation, custody/access, or support claims, we are the firm for you.

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